If there’s one thing that can change everything in your life, from how your relationships work to how you feel about yourself, it’s this: taking responsibility for you.
Taking responsibility means pulling yourself out of victim mode – steering clear of those unhelpful ‘why’ questions, like ‘Why did this happen to me?’ or ‘Why can’t I be smarter/richer/more attractive?’.
Taking responsibility is about acknowledging that the buck stops with you. It means turning your back on unhealthy beliefs, like everyone else is to blame for your mistakes/unhappiness/failures. It also means cleaning up any messes you’ve made and working on the parts of your life that are crying out for attention. This applies to your relationships, your career, your decision-making – the works.
While taking responsibility for yourself can be a bit of a process (and no, there aren’t any shortcuts), the pay-off is that you’ll become more self-aware, emotionally intelligent and mindful of the impact you have on others. You’ll also be better at saying sorry. All of these things are essential when it comes to maintaining healthy personal and professional relationships.
Interestingly, our beliefs about change influence our ability to own our mistakes. Several years ago, a study
found that the more strongly people believed they could change, the more likely they were to take responsibility for their actions.
If you want to be truly authentic, improve your relationships and - to put it bluntly - become a generally better person, start by making a list of all the things that you need to take responsibility for. Ask yourself:
- What do I need to say sorry for?
- What do I need to let go of?
- What do I need to change?
- What do I need to do better?
- What excuses do I need to stop making?
- Who do I need to invest more time with?
- How can I be more respectful and kind?
- What are the stories I tell myself that don’t serve me?
- Do I have enough people around me, who inspire me to be better at being me?
Anyone can take responsibility for themselves. And the positive effects are immediate. It might cost you time and call your ego to account, but imagine what might be different.
So, step into your grown-up boots and start taking ownership where it’s due.
– The Coach Place Global
Image by Brett Jordan
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